A (Not-So) Brief Summary of My Grad School Dilemma

Hello, friends, hello! I have been extremely silent the past month, partially because it’s been an exceptionally busy one, but also because I wasn’t quite sure what to say next or how. As the title suggests, I’ve been struggling with myself over where to go to grad school. I didn’t want to write anything else until I’d decided, and it was a very multifaceted decision, so here we are a month later.

A couple of you already know some about the situation, but for the vast majority of you who don’t, I’m about to catch y’all up right quick (in bullet-point format, because I looove bullet points):

  • The last time I updated y’all, I had been accepted into the M.S. in Medical Physiology program at Loyola University Chicago. I was thrilled at the news, and I immediately accepted and began making plans to move myself to the Windy City come August. That was probably 2 months ago? I don’t remember exactly. Anyway, Loyola has such a beautiful med school and the program director was so incredibly helpful, not only in terms of grad school, but also in terms of advising me on my medical school application and timeline. To put it briefly, I was sold.
  • I submitted my FAFSA and waited to hear back from the school about possible financial aid. About a month ago, my financial aid info came back from Loyola, and the school apparently does not offer any scholarships or assistantships for my specific program, though I could get everything covered by student loans.
  • In all, the year in Chicago would cost me about $60,000 in loans. Factor in the loan interest I would need to be paying throughout medical school (actual loan payments can be deferred until after med school graduation, but interest would accrue continuously starting next summer), and that’s another $18,000-ish up front. Not daunting at all, nope, not one bit.
  • [REWIND ABOUT 5 MONTHS] Around when I had begun to REALLY suspect (correctly, as it turned out) that I wouldn’t be accepted to med school for Fall 2014, I found a 2-year M.S. in Biomedical Sciences program at East Carolina University, which is (a) in my home state and (b) one of the two medical schools to which I gained an interview this past cycle. So, I took the GRE, whipped out the checkbook once again, and applied. I had completely forgotten about that application by the time graduation and everything else rolled around in May.
  • [BACK TO THE PRESENT] Not a day after the financial aid shit hit the fan with Loyola, ECU’S M.S. program director called to tell me that I had been accepted for this fall.
  • The very next day, he called me back because he had forgotten to tell me that they wanted to give me a $12,000 assistantship towards my first year (I didn’t ask to be considered for anything like that, so I was more than a little shocked), which would entirely cover tuition and even a good chunk of my estimated living expenses. As it turns out, they offer these assistantships to five applicants per year. FIVE. Including all of the current medical students who choose to pursue this degree during their time there. So there was that.
  • The second year is of minimal cost anyway, because it is predominantly spent in a research lab and the tab would be picked up by my future P.I.’s grant money.
  • It was a real dilemma I had for myself.
  • The dilemma stemmed from these two programs being different in almost every way possible. Loyola’s is one year long, lecture-based, focused exclusively on human physiology in its coursework, and offers an interview to their medical school to any student who maintains a certain GPA. ECU’s is two years, thesis-based, focused on biomedical and clinical research that is supplemented by lectures, and does not offer any such interview incentive. The pricetag difference is comical. Loyola has a more prestigious name, but ECU would allow me to further my interests in research with this time before medical school. Loyola would allow me to get to medical school potentially a year sooner, but not necessarily, depending on the way the application-cycle-cookie crumbled. I just wasn’t sure if Loyola’s pros, as awesome as they are, outweighed its significant cons (the cons being $$$, being farther away from home, and no research opportunities).

SO, after a good assortment of prayer, long talks with family and close friends, and lots of thought, I chose ECU! As such, I’m not reapplying to medical school quite yet. Now seems like a good time to throw out another huge thanks to Z and doctororbust, both of whom are wonderful people and generously edited the personal statement that is no longer being used for this application cycle. Your feedback was immensely helpful and I owe each of y’all a beer! 🙂

But in all seriousness, having been to visit a couple of times since reaching this decision, I’ve realized more and more how fantastic of a fit this program is going to be for me.

OH ALMOST FORGOT: my MD/PhD lab mentor from undergrad defended his thesis about a week after I was accepted to ECU. As I watched him elegantly and succinctly condense all 4 years of his work, including the 18 months’ worth of my contributions, into a one-hour presentation, I realized I truly wasn’t ready to be done with research. That was rather conveniently timed in this whole thing as well.

So, there you have it! Now that I’ve gotten all that off my chest, I feel much better and able to blog regularly again. I hope y’all have been having fantastic summers! Good luck to everyone starting a new school year of any variety next month!

“I’m Gettin’ PAPER”

(Title to be read in Busta Rhymes’s voice)

I’ve been a research assistant for the past year or so in one of the chemistry department’s labs at my school. I had the option to be paid hourly for my contributions, but I chose class credit instead. Kinda sad when three credit hours of A per semester seem more valuable than an actual paycheck. OH WELL.

But, I digress. My boss, who’s an MD/PhD student at the med school here, told me this week that I should start writing because we’re going to submit a paper on our work in the next few months! I’ve never been published before. I was hoping we’d get far enough in our research to publish, but with graduation and summer and potential relocation all coming up around the corner, I wasn’t sure if I would still be here to make any sort of contribution to the effort. Fortunately, that seems not to be a concern.

In an effort to get straight to work, I started an extensive literature search, found a long list of viable citations, opened a new word document, and typed “Introduction” at the top of the screen. The excitement of potentially having my name printed in a scientific journal was immediately put on hold once I realized I had no idea what to write first. My cursor is still blinking on an extremely blank word document. I may or may not be typing this partially to feel like I’m making some sort of progress on it. How does one even start to put these things into words? The past 15 months of my life somehow have to go into concise, organized, cohesive paragraphs with pretty figures and graphs interwoven between. Not sure how this is going to happen yet, but my cursor is going to keep blinking until something inspired ends up on that page, damnit.

How I feel when I’m in the lab

Side note: if you’re reading my blog and you’re a fellow premed, and you take one thing from this post, let it be this: RESEARCH EXPERIENCE TEACHES YOU SO MUCH MORE THAN ANY LECTURE EVER COULD. If you come across any opportunity at all to do research while you’re in college (or even after college, it really doesn’t matter when), absolutely take advantage of it. It’s one thing to study processes on paper in a classroom, but to have to put them into action and force yourself to understand the concepts causing the things happening right in front of you is an entirely different ballgame. Additionally, research requires a degree of creativity that simply isn’t necessary in a lecture hall; pretty much everything you try in the lab is going to fail in some way or another, with varying degrees of severity, and you have to create a way to avoid that particular failure the next time around. I realize I’m going off on a bit of a tangent, so I’m just going to cut it off right here. In conclusion: do research!

Science Joke Saturday: “Gallbladder’s Last Day”

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"Gallbladder's Last Day" - courtesy of the Awkward Yeti

Yup. Science Joke Saturday is a thing now. And, for the inaugural post, here’s this gem of a cartoon that showed up on the Awkard Yeti recently. If you hadn’t seen it yet, you’re welcome (gotta love a little med humor).

I’ve Been MIA…

…and I apologize for that. WHOOPS. I haven’t posted in about a month and that’s highly unfortunate. So here I am!

I am in the middle of my last spring break of undergrad, and it’s a bittersweet feeling (I’m ready to graduate, but I sure will miss these intermittent weeks off!). I did not go on a crazy, exotic, adventurous trip because AMCAS and secondaries stole the majority of my $$$ (true story). However, it’s been a peaceful week to catch up on sleep, catch up with old friends I haven’t caught up with in far too long, and re-focus myself to optimize my final two months of college.

Main three goals from now until May:

BLOG MORE. All of you who bother following my blog are awesome, and it’s such a comfort to know just how many other people there are going through a similar process as I am. So thank you! 🙂 As such, I definitely plan to post on here more often, even if there’s nothing big to talk about at all.

GRADUATE CUM LAUDE. I am so so so close to having a 3.5 GPA. Like, 0.02 away. Unfortunately, it’s somewhat difficult to increase with having 125ish credit hours to my name. So I guess this is my oath to hit the books extra hard for the next couple of months.

DO MORE EXPLORING OFF CAMPUS. I have the privilege of going to school in the Triangle, which, if you’ve never been down here, is home to an incredible conglomeration of research universities, biotech companies (think RTP), awesome basketball, and just the right amount of Deep South. People are ridiculously smart and ambitious here, but that won’t stop them from throwing out a smile and a “Morning, y’all” to anyone passing by on their way to get coffee or lead a team meeting or head into classes. The Triangle has all kinds of hidden gems, especially in terms of food (and more food), coffee, and breweries (my personal fave!), and I want to explore as many of those as possible before potentially leaving the area!

Baby French press at one of my favorite coffee shops